Tip of the tongue for Week 26

Stuff heard or read for the week of 27 June – 03 July 2011.

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OMG, THE PUNS!

The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

To become an electrician you have to pass a battery of tests.

What’s Irish and stays outside all year? Patty O’Furniture.

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UV-degradable and biodegradable are different things.

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“Marching to the beat of an imaginary drummer.”

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“My anger management counsellor can beat up your assertiveness trainer.”

(05 July 2011)

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© The Naked Listener’s Weblog, 2011.

Tip of my tongue for Week 25

HEARD or seen or passed on to me for the week of 20-26 June 2011.

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WORDPLAYS & MINDGAMES

He didn’t tell his mother that he ate some glue. His lips were sealed.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

If you leave alphabet soup on the stove and go out, it could spell disaster.

I could not pull out of my parking space, so I used my back-up plan.

I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.

It is tough to do inventories in Afghanistan because of the tally ban.

A cardboard belt would be a waist of paper.

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HEARD

“How’s he gonna read that magazine rolled up like that?”

(17 June)

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REALITY, DEFINED

Coffee: Aqueous extract of burnt beans.

(12 June)

No fair way to trade rainforest for coffee.

(12 June)

Worse thingz dhan in yohr toilet awr in yohr kitchen sink.

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© The Naked Listener’s Weblog, 2011.

Tip of the tongue for Week 17

Overheard or read but originally for the week of 28 March to 03 April 2011 (Week 13).

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“No, designers are not rebels. They’re anything but. Designers are people versed in carrying out rebellions, but they’re not rebels. A designer is someone whose mind is capable of overturning the established view [...] the established order [...] in order to produce, create [...] something different from before.

“Design isn’t something that you just sit down, make some sketches, come up with something no one else has come up with before. That comes way, way back after. That’s [...] the technical details [...] after they have the design in their heads long, long before that stuff happens.

“You don’t understand the valuableness of the designers you employ. Frankly speaking, you’ve been letting go all of your better designers but you’re asking your obedient ones to come up with disobedient designs.”

(Business owner with friend, 01 April 2011, 2.45pm)

© The Naked Listener’s Weblog, 2011.

Tip of the tongue for Week 12

Overheard or read for the week of 21-27 March 2011.

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“Gospel is liberal. Law is conservative. You cannot believe them at once. At best, you can choose which one will cause less suffering in the future.”

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“A person who thinks logically provides a deep contrast to the real world.”

(Geddit?)

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“If you drink coffee and you cannot read, then please have your parents explain this.”

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“Psst is onomatopoeia.”

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“The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don’t just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.” — James Nicoll

(hat tip to the Speculative Grammarian)

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“I refuse to say your name during sex because I’m afraid I’ll say your brother’s.”

(hat tip to Postsecret)

© The Naked Listener’s Weblog, 2011.

Tip of the tongue for Week 9

Overheard or read for the week of 28 Feb–06 March 2011.

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“What do you do when people think they know better what’s best for you than you do?!”

(via lina writes)

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“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing — that’s why we recommend it daily.”
— Hilary “Zig” Ziglar, American author and motivational speaker (b. 1926)

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“The shell must break before the bird can fly.” — Alfred Tennyson

(hat tip to Sally Gilchrest-Unrau, 02/3)

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“ ‘We live in a culture where pushing beyond our limits and almost killing ourselves at our own expense and that of those who love us has become heroic. What a crock!’ The passage also talks about how challenging ourselves is perfectly respectful of ourselves. That there is a difference between challenging ourselves and pushing ourselves so far that we’ve reached the end of our rope (and may, in fact, be hanging on by only a thread).”

(hat tip to Another Day, Another Face, 02/3)

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microwave mentality (n)
Having the attitude that if something can’t be done in 5 minutes or less, it’s not worth doing.

(via Urban Dictionary, 04/3)

© The Naked Listener’s Weblog, 2011.