Non-idiomatic, non-colloquial English answers

Sunday 21 March 2010, 9.00am HKT


Those of us living stranded in this part of the world (Asia, that is) are more than wide-eyed conscious of the perverted and psychotic fetish among most Asians to sound like native speakers when it comes to speaking English.

So, a couple of us got talking as to the most English-sounding answers that could be had.

The hypothetical question is …

“So you wanted to leave him after that?”

The six proper and highly grammatical authentic English answers that we could come up with …

A1. Yes, I wanted to leave him very much for a long time. (Turgid but acceptable, probably Hungarian.)

A2. Yes, I really wanted to leave him for a long time. (A bit old-fashioned, for virgin ears.)

A3. I SOOO wanted to. (Throwback to the 1970s?)

A4. Did I EVER. (Chiefly London, non-Cockney.)

A5. Did I fuck-ING ever. (London, with determination to dump him.)

A6. Did I FUCK. (Totally London, especially with the educated classes.)

For those who didn’t understand answer A6, it’s a semi-contractile elided confirmatory imperative sentence structure of answer A5. Do you understand now? Do you fuck …

No, dude, homeboy lingo is like a dildo up and inside his wick. It’s brutal, man, it’s major brutal.

(20 March 2010)

Comments are closed.

Diary of a Psychokiller

take a trip with me to the darkside

Lipsync Lawyer

Stop bitching and know your law differently

Daring Fireball

Hearing ordinary lives talk

Girl in Florence

A Tuscan Texan immersed in Florentine life: passionate about food & wine | random moments | and travel

One Drawing Daily

I've been drawing and painting and learning (almost) every day since the 9th September 2014

An English Man In SF

a diary of life as an immigrant

MB Forde

Ghosts, Legends, Folklore and Writing

Motorcycling in Hong Kong

On two wheels in Asia's World City

Tinkerbelle

Making her way back to Neverland one day at a time...

The Naked Listener's Weblog

Hearing ordinary lives talk

Basti in China

Random stuff from Hong Kong and China

Making Maps: DIY Cartography

Resources and Ideas for Making Maps

Pointless Diagrams

A new, meaningless diagram drawn daily, just 'cause.

This Blog Needs Words

The greatest WordPress.com site in all the land!

The London Column

Reports from the life of a city, from 1951 to now, compiled by David Secombe

Vintagerock's Weblog

Just another WordPress.com weblog

%d bloggers like this: