Site Updates: Furloughed pages

Friday 9 December 2011, 4.52am HKT


Dear all,

Barely three weeks remain of year 2011 and overhaul of the blogsite is sorely needed.

New navbar tab

Added a Facebook tab to the blog navigation bar (that’s the bunch of words underneath the masthead photo of the pretty lady’s pretty-purtee eyes).

I can relate to why people tend not to scroll all the way down to the page for that link.

Furloughed pages

Eight pages below are on temporary leave of absence until the New Year 2012 for overhaul and redaction (please look that word up yourself).

About Me

placeholder page explains why the original About Me is being overhauled. New and improved version should rematerialise after Christmas, but positively no later than 20 January 2012.

There, the 25 fun facts about The Naked Listener are, well, considerably more numerous than 25. Randomness being something of a virtue as well as a vice of mine, the About me page is in serious want of reorganisation and redaction. Srsly. Orz.

(Some say ‘reduction’ might be more appropriate.)

Why 20 January? No reason. Just a random date so I get off my lazy backside. After all, 21 May 2012 is when the world as we know it will end…

Ask me anything!

Srsly, I should rename this Spam me senseless! instead. Looking into ways to reinstate this.


Lists the super-interesting sites that I follow and recommend. It’s a mess right now. Srsly.

Clubbing Calendar

Non compos mentis right now — un-updated, cold and starving, unloved and forgotten like Patroclus. It’s proving too much work to update it, so instead I’m considering doing weekly roundups of events, gigs, parties and other assorted soirées that I get invited to — for the benefit of stalkers readers who might just want to beat the living bejesus out of me shake my hand.


Reorganisation and redesign, plus new additions being planned for.


Tricky bastard, this. Love to have it on, but it’s also a spam piss-stream. Will be incorporated into the new About Me.


This is srsly brain-damaged. Srsly. Normally that stuff should go in About Me, but the moronic types have managed to pwn me into restating my life philosophy in a separate page. To be merged into the new About Me.

Web apps

Another mess in sore need of overhaul and the updating of deadlinks.

Current lineup

The current lineup in the blog navigation bar looks like this:

Learn English or Starve is an subsidiary blog of The Naked Listener’s Weblog — electrifying for sure, but nowhere near as entertaining as here. (But you know that already.)

Thank you all for your patience and understanding.

Yours faithfully,

The Naked Listener
(a.k.a. the Seeker of Serendipity, the Defender of Italian Virginity, the Spiller of Secrets, etc)

(Too many self-aggrandising titles. You’re fired. — Editor.)

© The Naked Listener’s Weblog, 2011.

Remember the Gingerbread Man?

Friday 9 December 2011, 1.07am HKT

The Gingerbread Man
(Photo © Leticia Acuna) 

* * *

The Gingerbread Man Song

(to the tune of “Jimmy Crack Corn”)

A baker took some gingerbread dough
And shaped a man from head to toe.
When it was baked, the cookie fled.
Here is what the cookie said:

Run! Run! As fast as you can!
You can’t catch me, I’m the gingerbread man!
I’m the gingerbread man!
Run! Run! As fast as you can!
I’m the gingerbread man!

The cooke man ran past a cow
Who said, “I want to eat you now!”
The cookie man just laughed and fled.
Here is what the cookie said:


A farmer saw the man go by.
He chased him low, he chased him high
The cookie man just shook his head.
Here is what the cookie said:


He finally reached the river wide,
A fox asked, ‘Would you like a ride?’
The cooke sat on the fox’s head,
Here is what the sly fox said:
‘You can’t run! That’s my plan!
I’m going to eat you, gingerbread man!’

This is the version that I remembered. There are other variants of this classic English nursery rhyme.

* * *

Here’s a little ditty of the recipe for gingerbread man (for those who never knew):

Homemade Gingerbread

Stir a bowl of gingerbread,
Smooth and spicy brown.
Roll it with a rolling pin,
Up and up and down.
With a cookie cutter,
Make some little men.
Put them in the oven,
Till half past ten.

© The Naked Listener’s Weblog, 2011. Image © Leticia Acuna, 2011.

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