Je suis la nouvelle année

2.58am local time, 12°C (54°F), cold with heavy rain

I think most of us should be on 2015 by now — and probably falling apart like everything else is already in this world of ours.

Normally on the first day of the new year, I post this sort of embarrassment to remind peep’l just who (and what) is behind the unfunny hilarity of this blog. I broke with my own tradition and posted this shameless nonsense for 2014.

I might as well go with breaking the tradition for this year.

Because heaven knows when the next post will ever come…

For your viewing pleasure, some nosey-parkery random fun facts about The Naked Listener.

Each item originates from at least one serious, factual, objective detail about me. They’re only done up in a special way to make them seem less serious.

Elle Ess Dee (Part 2)

<< BACK TO PART 1

8.09am local time, 27°C (81°F), rainy days and nights

RHINO AND LOLLY,
BREAD AND HONEY

Life used to be coin-operated.

Nearly everything in the old days was priced, sold, bought and paid for in coins. Then Mammon (Thatcher) came to power. We went full retard and everything began to cost in notes (‘bills’ to our American cousins).

By the way, “bread and honey” is Cockney slang for ‘money.’

‘What’s that in old money?’

UK decimal ‘shrapnel’: the 20p came in the 1980s and £1 later still
(via UK Metric Association)

Elle Ess Dee

>> PART 2

10.26pm local time, 24°C (75°F), heavy rain

Here he comes again … another nostalgic overdrive…

(via Imgur)

It’s not what you think. I’m not talking about the drug LSD (‘acid’).

Heaven help you people, you know when I’m being nostalgic, it’s TL;DR overdrive.

Recommended background music when reading this:—

Stars on 45: The Charts 1975–1979 on SoundCloud

The length of that medley is EXACTLY the time it takes to read his incredibly longwinded escapade of nostalgia.